Different Parenting Styles: Authoritarian Parenting

Blind Obedience Only Leads to Morally Blind Children

The authoritarian parenting style is one of four parenting styles that are commonly seen among parents. We have covered the other styles in our other Parenting Help articles - you will also find lots of practical advice on how to become the perfect parent.

Authoritarian Parenting Characteristics

These parents are not evil bloodthirsty dictators.

There is a reason why the political figures Idi Amin, Pol Pot and Hitler are reviled in history. They were tyrants who ruthlessly cut down any opposition. And their word was law. They were wicked, sadistic people who committed atrocities to serve their own selfish needs.

Authoritarian parents are certainly not in the same class as the aforementioned despicable specimens of humanity. The majority of these parents are actually good people who really mean well for their kids. It is just that many of them have strong expectations of their children and will do anything to make their kids learn responsibility and succeed academically.

So what are the qualities of this poor parenting style?

Authoritarian parents do love their children. However, they are often not warm to their children. Any love they show their children is conditional. In other words, children only receive love when they meet the expectations of their parents.

These parents also don't regard their children's thoughts and feelings as important. They expect their children to obey without question. They are quite rigid - children are not given any room for discussion. All the rules are set by the parents - children have no say in them. They do not explain the reasons behind their rules to their children. They often reply, "You do it because I'm your parent," whenever their children argue with them.

They also resort to corporal punishment if everything else fails. In a nutshell, what these parents want is obedience and compliance at all costs. There are consequences to this poor style of parenting. Let's look at them next.

Authoritarian Parenting Consequences on Children

As children of authoritarian parents have an adult breathing down their necks all the time, they can become fearful, withdrawn, self-conscious and inhibited. Some of them even succumb to depression.

These children also do not learn how to solve problems as their parents often coerce them to do things their way. The poor children, sadly, won't be able to cope with the real world with all its challenges and uncertainty when they grow up. The goal of any parent should be to teach their children to be resilient and cope with whatever situation they find themselves in.

Some children do appear to be good in front of their parents. But they are not very well behaved when their parents are not around. That is because they only obey out of fear. They are not likely to internalize moral values.

Others get angry and openly rebel. This can lead to a lot of shouting matches between parents and children. This cycle of negative parent-child interaction will only escalate as time goes by.

This is the End of this Article.

If you think that you might be an authoritarian parent, please don't worry. We have written lots of articles on becoming the perfect parent, all based on research by psychologists. Please visit Parenting Help for practical parenting advice.

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